Meet Ross Leppala: Powerlifting & Life Coach

We had the good fortune of connecting with Ross Leppala and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Ross, what’s the most difficult decision you’ve ever had to make?
The most difficult decision I’ve ever had to make was the day I had to give up a boy who had become my son. In 2008 I started dating a girl who had a 6-month-old son, Ian. I fell in love with him and being his dad as his biological father was not in the picture. It was a toxic relationship right from the start and I choose to stay in it for all the wrong reasons. I thought we could become better. I wanted to be Ian’s dad. We were together for about 2 years and were engaged for 6 months of that. While I was out of town for a work trip, she cheated on me. Her own best friend of 15 years told me what happened and I confronted her about her actions. After having put up with severe emotional abuse during the entire relationship, that was enough. It was time to end the relationship as it was not healthy for anyone involved. I couldn’t continue to be in a relationship with her just to be Ian’s dad. I had to find another way. On the final day of her move from our place, her father called me. He was terminally ill with throat cancer. This is how the conversation went. Dad: “Hey man, I don’t usually get involved in these things but the way you going about this is all wrong. Now I’m a dying man, so I won’t hesitate to come out there and put one in your head!” Me: “Woah! What are you talking about?” Dad: “The way you are doing this is all wrong. Kicking her out, making her move everything by herself. That’s all wrong man!” Me: “Ya know man, nothing against you but your daughter is a lying whore. She cheated on me. I asked her to move out. She left right away, her choice. I didn’t kick her out. I’ve made two trips with her stuff with my own time and gas. I have all the rest of her shit packed in the front ready to go. I’ll load it all myself, she doesn’t even have to get out. I just want to move on with my life.” Dad: “Ah shit, sorry man. I should have known better. This isn’t the first time she has done this to me.” CLICK That click was the hard realization that I was faced with a very difficult choice. A choice that honestly hurts to this day. I don’t regret it, but it is a hurt that will never go away. I knew at that moment that if I were to try and maintain a friendship with her to be in Ian’s life, she would use that to drag me through the mud any chance she got. Not only was that not going to be right for me, but it was also going to be detrimental for Ian in the long run. I had no legal rights to anything here. Gut-wrenching. It was tough and there are still plenty of days where knowing that is tough. I’m left wondering about Ian and how he right be doing. However, it was a big turning point for me in my life as well. I realized my lack of authenticity and ability to stand up for myself was what got me so far down that path in the first place. It’s been an incredible healing journey since then on self-discovery, growth, and healing. I’ll always miss Ian. I love that kid so much. For the direction my life has taken, the best thing I can ever do to honor that is to no waiver in my authenticity. In doing that, in demonstrating that lesson learned, I feel I can honor what he taught me. Carrying that forward and possibly impacting others with my story of healing, in a way, Ian can have that impact on more people than just me. The greatest growth often comes from the greatest struggles.

Alright, so let’s move onto what keeps you busy professionally?
I went to school for civil/structural engineering and practiced that for about 12 years. Near the end of that career, I was also doing some part-time powerlifting coaching. I was loving that work and getting to help people work towards and accomplish their goals was incredibly rewarding. In September 2018 I transitioned away from engineering and started coaching full time. It wasn’t long into that change that I had an important realization. Not one time had I ever wanted to be an engineer. I was so passionate about coaching and getting to work with and help people. I love it! By night, I work on my life coaching adventure. Through my journey of healing, paired with the career change, it’s become clear that I have a passion for helping people. I want to do more with that. When I was 12 I attempted suicide. I shoved that under the rug for most of my life. In this healing, I realize my silence only fuels the problem. Not only in myself, but in others and society. Which is now something that drives and inspires me in what I do. From my podcast, Project Unchain{ED} to other programs and motivational speeches that are in development at this time. I just want to help people have a grand life experience!

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
Being the type of person who really enjoys the outdoors, I would take them on a tour of some of the waterfalls around the area. That’s a lot of what we have been into when we have that time, we chase waterfalls. So we’d probably check out: Amicalola Toccoa Panther Creek Falls Tallulah Gorge Desoto Falls Then being a craft beer fan, I’d have to take them to a few of the favorites I visit Dry County Red Hare Glover Park Wild Leap School House Rock For food, a few of the local favorites for me are Atami Sushi Butcher and the Baker Taqueria Sunami Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
My partner, Vanessa Gale, has played such an incredible role in my healing journey. I basically fell in love with her the second I saw her. From there, the sparks were very mutual. We were just flirty friends from a distance for the first two years of our relationship. Then we opened up and were in a polyamorous relationship for a little over a year. During that time I realized I had a lot of dark demons in my thoughts still. The thing about being in a polyamorous relationship is that you can no longer ignore those unhealed wounds in your soul. They create insecurities that seem to scream louder in a relationship like that. I hired a life coach and started working on myself. A year into that, Vanessa split up with me. She just had her daughter Rosalie and needed to be present with her. At the time, Vanessa was living in GA and I was still in Alaska. I was hurt so badly! I felt like I lost another kid. It was incredibly painful. I was able to draw some power from a conversation I had with my mom where I mentioned that I was learned so much from this relationship that was going to empower me for life so much more than any previous relationship I had. So regardless of whether it was a long-term thing, I was learning such valuable lessons. At that moment, I leaned in hard on my discovery, self-care, and healing. The crazy part was about a year later Vanessa and I was finally able to talk about where we were at again. I had come to a point where I was really good with myself and healed a lot. As a result of that, I realized how much I missed my friend and wanted that back with her. As we got together at an event we were both at, it was back on like it never stopped. We had done the work for ourselves and getting ourselves right created the space for our togetherness. Now, we’ve been back together for a few years since then. I moved to GA and we now live together. It’s a constant upward spiral of personal development, healing, masculine/feminine spiritual growth through deep meaningful sexual connection, and the constant open door of communication. She was such a huge inspiration for me to really dig deep into my own healing, I would likely still be less conscious of my life if it wouldn’t have been for her influence!

Instagram: ross.leppala

Facebook: Ross Leppala

Other: Podcast: https://anchor.fm/ross-leppala